A productive weekend

Yesterday, in the mail, I received my prescription for a "cranial prosthesis"--know what that is? A wig, of course. How goofy is that? Whatever...I'll hang onto it for awhile. I ended up emailing my ole pal KB about coming to clean house with me, because she cleans like me, one little piece at a time. Of course, she had told her husband BEFORE receiving my email that she was going to stay home from closing up her inlaws' lake house in case she could come help me. Which she did...

She vacuumed on hands and knees until she got blisters, I think. Then she manhandled the big vacuum on the DR rug until it was lovely. Meanwhile Mimi and Papa came by and while Papa helped in the barn with Handyman, Mimi sewed and then helped me wash out the drawers in the kitchen where the MOUSE was hanging out until I disturbed him!

Handyman wanted to watch Iron Man last night instead of Get Smart. I made it for about 10 minutes or so and thought I was going to puke. So, I propped my knees up and tried to read a book and then tried to sleep and then turned over to watch the last 5 minutes. Not my cup of tea, at this time anyway. Once he started pulling the long tube out of his nose, I was done.

Between watching the tiny bit of Iron Man with his "implanted" body part and reading my book about a modern woman waking up in someone else's body in Jane Austen's time, I laid in bed being depressed about not having all my original parts. When my kid lays her head against my chest for a hug, I feel like there's a big ziploc container there. They're just kind of robo-bosoms--no life; stand-ins, props.

I guess that's something you just have to adjust to. They're not the originals, but there's nothing to be done about that. It is what it is. I miss them a little--in all their imperfections, but they were "me". I thought about people who have accidents or suffer in war, coming home with lots of "parts" that aren't original. You adjust, overcome, put it away and move on, or you dwell and fuss and do yourself no good.

As my scabs come off, along with the blue blob, I guess it's about time to accomodate the feelings that are easier avoided. I threw out the old pages from my daytimer, from September and October. There was the date that had my mammogram, then the date for the biopsy, then the date I sat in the car in the sunshine and heard I had cancer. Then the date with the surgeon and the date for the MRI and the date with the plastic surgeon and the surgery and thrown all in there my birthday and whew! So many things gone already--like cancer. Gone, done, overcome. I told #1 today, I do not have cancer. I had it, but it's been removed and that part is done, fini!

Today I feel yukky. I stayed home from church because I was tired, but that turned into painful cramps in my gut that come and go. Finally, this afternoon I took a Darvocet along with my anti-nausea thing because the pains are like labor pains, only with no smiling bundle as a result!

It's actually a pretty nice day out and we're going to try to take a family picture this afternoon, hopefully.

I told Handyman I am glad that my chemo is now rather than spring or summer. It'll all be over when the spring starts coming and I am very thankful for that. In the meantime, I'll be the Milk of Magnesia poster girl for the coming months and never take for granted the rhythms of one's bodily functions. ;)